Should You Take a Cheater Back? – Here’s How to Decide

Under what circumstances should you take a cheater back? How do you decide whether or not to give a cheating spouse or significant other a second chance? It depends on the circumstances under which the cheating occurred, and the cheater’s attitude about the affair.

When to Consider Giving the Cheater a Second Chance

If the cheater is genuinely sorry, has severed all ties with the Other Woman or the Other Man, and is willing to fully cooperate and do the hard work necessary to restore the relationship and rebuild the broken trust, then you might want to consider taking the cheater back and giving him or her a second chance if the infidelity occurred under the following circumstances:

• As an isolated incident, such as a one night stand.
• Under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
• While going through a midlife crisis.
• As a misguided response to a life crisis such as the death of a loved one or the loss of a job.
• In cases of sexual addiction, where the cheater is seeking, or willing to seek medical or professional help.

But forgiveness shouldn’t be handed over on a silver platter. It’s something you need to make the cheater earn. Otherwise, you’re only setting the stage for the cheating to happen again.

When NOT to Give the Cheater a Second Chance

It’s probably not a good idea to give the cheater a second chance if he or she:

• Refuses to sever ties with the Other Woman or the Other Man
• Continues to lie about any aspect of the affair
• Is a habitual or serial cheater who has had one or more affairs in the past
• Feels no guilt or remorse for having hurt his/her partner;
• Wants to sweep the affair under the rug and proceed as if nothing has happened
• Feels he or she has a right to cheat or have an extramarital affair
• Does not feel that the cheating was wrong
• Is a sex addict who refuses to seek help

Other Factors to Consider When Deciding if You Should Take a Cheater Back

In addition to the circumstances of the cheating and the cheater’s attitude about the affair, there are several other factors you should take into consideration:

• the type of infidelity
• what stage the affair is in
• the degree of the cheater’s emotional attachment to the Other Woman or the Other Man
• the cheater’s feelings about infidelity in general
• the cheater’s level of commitment to you and to your marriage or relationship,

NOTE: For more information about taking a cheater back, see the article posted on http://www.infidelityadvice.com/ entitled: When Should You Give a Cheater a Second Chance?


A Major Obstacle to Taking the Cheater Back

The biggest obstacle to taking a cheating spouse or significant other back is the fear that the cheater will cheat on you again. It’s a valid fear and the only way to overcome it is to become thoroughly familiar with both the obvious and not-so-obvious signs of infidelity. This way, you’ll know right away if the cheating is still going on, or if the cheater is on the verge of cheating again.

Since most of the signs are subtle, knowing what to look for is the key. Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs covers practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs people usually overlook. Despite the title, most of the signs in the book apply to both cheating woman and cheating men. The signs are conveniently grouped into 21 major categories, so you can easily find the signs that apply to your mate.

For a free special report with detailed descriptions of each of the 21 categories of infidelity signs, and tips on what kind of signs to look for under each category, e-mail InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with 21 Categories Report - b in the subject line.

Affair Recovery Help in the E-book version of Is He Cheating on You?

The e-book version of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs available for $37 from http://www.booklocker.com/books/1755.html comes with a bonus section that will be especially helpful if you decide to take back your cheating mate. In addition to 3 other special reports, and a special section for men entitled Is SHE Cheating, the bonus section also contains the following affair recovery information:

• What the Two of You Must Do to Survive Your Husband’s Affair
• Advice for the Husband Who Cheated
• Advice for the Betrayed Wife
• Can Your Marriage Survive His Affair?
• Will He Cheat Again?

NOTE: The affair recovery reports DO NOT come with the soft cover edition of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs ($29.95) The special reports with the affair recovery information, are part of the BONUS SECTION included with the downloadable e-book version of Is He Cheating on You? Click here to order the e-book version of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs now. ($37)

For more information about infidelity, cheating spouses, or extramarital affairs, visit http://www.infidelityadvice.com/

Why Politicians Cheat and What Their Wives Can Do

As an infidelity expert, I’m often called on by the media to comment on infidelity issues in the news. The Spitzer sex scandal has resulted in the busiest week I’ve had for a while. I’ve done dozens of interviews with newspapers, large and small (USA Today, New York Daily News, Pittsburgh Post Gazette – just to name a few,) and 3 TV appearances (The Today Show, twice; and the Morning Show with Mike and Juliet)

Why Do Politicians and Other Men Cheat?

One of the main things I’ve been asked to comment on in almost every interview is some variation of why men cheat, or why politicians cheat on their wives.

Below, in a nutshell, is my viewpoint on some of the reasons why politicians, public figures, and other prominent, or rich and powerful men cheat on their wives.

Why Politicians Cheat

Why do politicians cheat? The reasons are complex and varied. In fact, there are probably as many reasons as there are politicians out there cheating. The reasons listed below are just a few.

A Sense of Entitlement

Many politicians and public figures feel they can do whatever they want because of who they are. They consider themselves exempt from the rules that apply to the rest of

The Thrill of the Chase

Many cheating men enjoy the subterfuge, the lying, the scheming associated with having an affair. Cheating politicians are no different. Cheating gives them the kind of adrenaline rush they’d get from participating in a high risk sport.

Ego-Embellishment Reasons

Having an extramarital affair can feed the already inflated ego that many politicians have. They can mentally congratulate themselves for being cunning enough to keep everyone around them in the dark about what they’re doing behind closed doors.

Viewing Infidelity as a Status Symbol

To many politicians and public figures, a mistress or high-priced call girl is a status symbol. Being able to afford one is seen as the ultimate mark of success.

The Excitement of Doing Something Forbidden

Just like ordinary men, some cheating politicians engage in infidelity or extramarital affairs solely for the excitement of doing something that’s forbidden.

The Knowledge that They Can Get Away With It

The main reason many politicians cheat on their wives and have extramarital affairs is because they are confident that they can get away with it. And countless numbers of them do. We only hear about the ones who get caught.

Help with Deciding Whether to Go or Stay

The Go or Stay Tip Sheet points out some of the key factors any betrayed wife should consider when trying deciding whether to leave a cheating husband, or give him a second chance. It also covers the two biggest obstacles to taking a cheating spouse back, and offers suggestions on how these obstacles can be overcome. To request a FREE copy of the Go or Stay Tip Sheet, e-mail InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with the words “Go or Stay-bSpz” in the subject line.

What Can the Wife of a Cheating Politician Do?

Is there anything the wife of a cheating politician can do to spot his infidelity before the whole world finds out about his extramarital affair? Yes! No matter how carefully a cheating politician tries to cover his tracks, there will ALWAYS be telltale signs. Knowing what to look for is the key. No cheater, regardless of how careful or how cunning he may be, can cover up every single sign of infidelity. But since most of the signs of infidelity are subtle, I can’t stress strongly enough that knowing what to look for is the key.

Learn How to Spot the Subtle Signs

Every politician’s wife should familiarize herself with the subtle signs of impending infidelity so she can stop a budding affair before it starts. She should also know how to spot infidelity already in progress before it gets out of hand or reaches the point of no return. Every politician’s wife should own a personal copy of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs. It covers practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs women usually overlook. The signs are conveniently grouped into 21 major categories, so the wife of any cheating politician can easily find the signs that apply to her marriage, her circumstances, or her mate.

If the wife of every cheating politician had a copy of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs in her personal library, more of these cheating politicians would get caught before their extramarital affairs were publicly exposed. And more political wives would be spared a lot of heartbreak and humiliation.

For a free special report entitled Is Your Spouse Cheating? - 21 Ways You Can Tell, e-mail InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with 21 Categories Report - b in the subject line. This report gives a detailed description of each of the 21 major categories of infidelity signs, and provides guidelines on what kinds of signs to look for under each category.

For more information on infidelity, cheating spouses, or extramarital affairs, visit http://www.infidelityadvice.com/

Getting Revenge on a Cheating Mate

Revenge cheating and retaliatory affairs are just two of the many tactics infidelity victims use to get back at a cheating spouse or significant other.

In my previous post I discussed how some victims of infidelity will even go so far as to embarrass or humiliate the cheater by having a revenge affair with the cheating spouse’s best friend, family member, or business rival. Or they may simply go out and have a one night stand just to feel that they’ve evened the score. I also explain how these tactics can backfire, and why they seldom work. You can read about it here.

However revenge cheating and retaliatory affairs are by no means the only ways infidelity victims seek to get revenge. An infidelity victim may try to get revenge by selling, giving away, or destroying personal property of the cheating spouse or significant other.

Creative Ways Women Get Revenge

They say “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." Women can be very creative when it comes to getting back at a cheating mate. One betrayed wife got revenge on her corporate executive husband by cutting one sleeve off each of his business and carefully hung the suits back in his closet before leaving him and taking the kids. She said she got great satisfaction from imagining his rage when getting dressed for work the next morning and finding out each of his business suits only had one arm.

Another women paid for a billboard in a prominent place, and told the whole town about her husband’s affair.

Other women have retaliated against cheating spouses by selling their sports cars, SUV’s, sail boats, golf carts, dirt bikes, power tools, and other prized possessions for mere pennies.

Women have been known to destroy the cheater’s car in various ways -- smashing the windshield or headlights, puncturing tires, scratching the finish or carving their initials or derogatory statements on the car, putting sugar in the gas tank, painting the windshield with black paint, and more

Other Ways Infidelity Victims Get Revenge

Still other infidelity, especially men – get even in violent ways such as physically assaulting or even killing the cheater, or the person with whom the cheater is having the affair. Prisons are filled with men who resorted to violent or destructive methods of getting revenge on a cheating mate.

Strangely enough, suicide has even been used as a misguided attempt to get back at a cheating spouse. Sometimes the wife or girlfriend of a cheating man may be so deeply hurt, and her power of reasoning so warped that she thinks, “I’ll kill myself and he’ll be sorry for what he did and miss me when I’m gone.”

Getting revenge on a cheater in such ways is never recommended. Things can backfire and you could easily find yourself on the wrong side of the law. You could even end up in jail.

The best revenge is to leave the cheater and have nothing further to do with them. Of course, if there are children involved, this is easier said than done.

FREE Tip Sheet on Ways to Legally and Financially Get Revenge on a Cheating Spouse

If you're really determined to get revenge on a cheating spouse, you're better off doing it legally or financially. There are legal ways to deal the cheater a devastating blow without running afoul of the law. For a free tip sheet on How to Legally or Financially Get Revenge on a Cheating Spouse, e-mail InfidelityInfo@gmail.com with "revenge tip sheet - b” in the subject line.

Getting Revenge Could Be Dangerous

However keep in mind that trying to get revenge on a cheating spouse who has violent or aggressive tendencies can be a dangerous game. No matter how much the cheater may deserve what he or she gets, they may retaliate against you in violent or aggressive ways. So tread carefully, or you could end up in the hospital – or even worse – the grave.

The Best Revenge of All

In the end, the best revenge may be to do nothing. Once the cheater is aware that you know about the affair,hold your head high, act honorably, and show the cheater that you don’t have to stoop to his or her level to seek revenge. Show them your life will go on just fine with or without them. The cheater will either be totally consumed with guilt over how he or she has treated you. Or he or she will never have peace of mind because they’ll keep looking over their shoulder, waiting for the “other shoe to drop.” And that may be the best revenge of all.

You can gain the upper hand without getting revenge. To find out how, send for the FREE tip sheet entitled How Wives with Cheating Husbands Can Gain the Upper Hand. To get your free copy, e-mail InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with “Upper Hand-b” in the subject line.

For more information about getting revenge, check out
http://getrevenge-gettingrevenge.blogspot.com/
Find out how to get revenge on your cheating husband/ boyfriend, or revenge on his lover.

Resources to Help You Plan How to Best Get Revenge

Phone Number Search - Find out whose phone number that is

A reverse phone number search can help you find out the name of the person your spouse or significant other is cheating with. Write down any suspicious or unfamiliar phone numbers you find on his or her cell phone bill, programmed into their cell phone, on your caller ID, or scribbled on scraps of paper or the back of business cards, Then use this service to do a reverse phone number search and find out whose phone number it is. Your search is 100% confidential. For an additional fee, this service also allows you to run a background check on any names you come across. For more information, click here, or go to http://www.cheatingspousephonesearch.com/

E-mail Address Search – Find out who an e-mail address belongs to

If your spouse or significant other is sending or receiving e-mails from his or her lover and you want to find out who the e-mail address belongs to, you can run a reverse e-mail address search with the largest e-mail search database on the internet. This is the same service used by law enforcement, government officials, lawyers, private investigators and many others. For more information, click here, or go to http://www.cheatingspouseemailsearch.com/

Background Checks – Get more information about the cheater, or their lover

If you have the name of your spouse or significant other’s lover and want find out more about this person, run a background check to find out things like whether or not the Other Woman or Other Man is married or divorced, where they live or work, if they have a criminal record, what property or businesses they own, and more. All background searches are confidential and can be quickly and anonymously done from your own computer in the comfort of your home. For more information, click here, or go to http://www.cheatingspousebackgroundcheck.com/